I have heard someone say "Any tattoo that is too serious is a bad tattoo". I am not sure how I feel about it. But I believe that most kitchen tattoos are terrible.

If you don’t have at least a few tattoos, are you even a chef? If you didn't use a knife, whisk or a complete Hobart blender to apply ink somewhere on your body, how would anyone know that you are a disciple of the culinary arts? Obviously, these elements are crucial. It's as important as shooting professional headshots with arms crossed, fully demonstrating tats.

When you see a bad food tattoo, you usually lack modesty. I have seen too many children who have just graduated from cooking school. When their job is to cut small potatoes, they have a whole set of kitchen equipment hanging on their arms. Think of all your favorite non-jerk chefs: J. Kenji López-Alt does not have the word "God of Food" printed on his chest. Although he is interested in this device, David Zhang did not have a tattoo on the microwave ( At least not yet).

Bottom line: When I say "bad chef tattoo", you know exactly what I mean. When you see them, you know them. Since there are so many bad chef tats out there, let's take a quick look at some of the worst.

Rotate the handle to change the weight

If you make rabbit sausages yourself or run a butcher shop in an upscale neighborhood, tattooing a pig picture on your body is standard. However, the problem with the pork map is that its atmosphere is too regional to be impressive. There is nothing cool about always knowing where things are. No one wants to fuck someone who likes a globe. The pig picture is what it looks like: a page in a textbook. This is a picture of...information. It's like being a criminal defense lawyer and tattooing the constitution on your biceps. Knowing these things is only part of your job. You are not cooler because you pay to take your work home. 

Damn it, despite your white jacket, plaid pants, and general anti-social attitude, I didn't know you were a chef until I saw the word "CHEF" tattooed on your body! You won't see train engineers saying "Choo Choo!" with tattoos on their necks. For gardeners, putting a small lawn mower on their shoulders is not iconic. I hope the number of doctors with “MD” tattoos on their wrists is very small.

The life of a chef is terrible. CHEF OR DIE is worse. But for those who have “YES, CHEF” permanently tattooed on their skin, hell has a special place. In any case, we need to add ceremonial bullets to the entire "yes, chef" procedure in the restaurant kitchen. I hope no one is asking their employees to speak up. Anyone is just a time traveler from the 2005 dining scene. Cooking should not imitate the military, and those who get "YES, CHEF" tattoos should hand mop.

The famous French term meaning "everything is in its place" is one of the few professional culinary creeds. This is almost biblical: Pierre-White 2:19: When mirepoix is ​​put in place, everything in the kitchen should be like this, and the chef need not worry.

However, even though the on-site arrangement is a boon, friend and chef Kenya Bovey said that the on-site tattoo arrangement is actually a curse, because "Once you get it, you will never set it on time."

Mise en place essentially means taking care of your shit and making sure you have everything ready before you start. I would say that this is the most sacred principle of cooking. Nevertheless, "Always be prepared!" Obviously not cool! On your body. May wish to tattoo "NEVR LATE" on your knuckles. Jesus Christ.

Knives are tools that chefs encounter every day at work. I don't know what I would think, for example, a plumber gets a plunger tattoo. In fact, I do know how I feel about it: this damn rule. But too many bad knife tattoos have destroyed this genre forever. Knives with flames and skulls, and sometimes blood. Oh, there are more words. A knife engraved with the word "exquisite" makes it hard for me to accept it.

Besides, I'm not sure what the meaning of kitchen knife tat is. In any case, you have been holding a knife most of the time. It is there; you can see it at any time. Of course, I think knives are a bit manly, but if you are a good cook, what you do with knives is actually very gentle. As my friend and comedian Amy Silverberg said: "Oh, tough guy. You cut the carrot, bitch."

One of the most creepy things you can do is to pay tribute to your idols by tattooing their faces. Some people here have Gordon Ramsay's rugged face inked on their stomachs. This may be true proof of your fans, but even if Bourdain’s iconic mug decorates your forearms, no one will respect you.

No one really wears these fucking things. They are like three feet tall; there is no practical point in wearing a damn chimney on your head. In addition, they are a cartoon version of the chef. People in prison actually don't wear striped clothing. They were eliminated centuries ago, brother. The tall chef hat symbolizes a white-dominated era, "yes the chef"-chirping. Put on your capless cap and bend your knees.

Here you are, although it made me laugh a little bit.